Written by: Mo & Phindi Grootboom
Article source: JOY! Magazine 

Marriage is the first institution ever to be created by God. However, with all the scientific intelligence the human race has developed over the years, marriage is still a mystery to us. Scarily enough, in spite of the fact that the church is the custodian of marriage, the church generally shies away from communicating the truth, or is broadly ignorant.

Seeking to learn
We went into marriage not only for the wrong reasons – noble as they may have been – but we were also unprepared. Like many married couples, we’ve dashed our feet against many stones in the period of our short marriage. Some of the worst pains we’ve experienced in our marriage are as a result of our naivety and bad choices, while some are simply because of life. We went through some of the hardest lessons about married life, and wish that somebody had forewarned us. 

Real world manual
Stuff We Wish We Knew Before Getting Married is the real-world manual we forged during the crests and troughs of toughing it out and loving each other through it all. We call the chapters in this book our ‘aha moments’ because we woke up to much of what we know about marriage, in marriage. As much as we prepared ourselves for marriage, it’s impossible to know everything before you get into it, until you actually get into it. Trying to learn everything before getting married will only frustrate you.

Offering our experiences
In this book, we’re consciously vulnerable. We’re offering our experiences to you with the hope that you’ll pick one or two things as lessons for your own marriage. Most importantly, we ultimately hope to refocus God as the centre of marriage in a 21st-century society that frowns at the idea of God being the author of marriage. We also write this book to highlight the fact that marriage, if it excludes God, is a futile get-together that just exists for selfish impulses and temporary reasons.

Read, learn, enjoy, disagree, critique, but – most importantly – may the love of God be illuminated by the time you file your copy of Stuff We Wish We Knew Before Getting Married on your bookshelf.

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Date published: 19/03/2020
Mo & Phindi Grootboom are relationship specialists and devoted believers and followers of Christ. They are SA Marriage Week Ambassadors as well as affiliated with Focus on the Family.

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